Food story saga recap


Anonymous Wendy's customer

These young men were unaware of the journey they were about to embark on.

Sean Cunningham, Features Editor

Ah, food challenges. And food reviews! My strapping colleague Patrick Roghaar and I have made a name for ourselves over the past two years with the great success of these articles. Coming into our junior years as eager staff writers, we wished to follow the legacy of former writers Will Hassel and Kyle Cunningham by creating entertaining and informative food-related articles, but I don’t think either of us could have predicted the impact we would go on to make within these two years. Before us, the food stories of old were few and far between, but Patrick and I ushered in a new Talon era, and a very tasty one at that. By the time this year’s papers started to be produced, it was clearly evident that an almost unbelievable amount of fellow staff writers had taken after our talents, and this year’s papers have been defined if nothing else by the pervasive presence of food-related  pieces. So, looking back on our achievements as journalists over the second half of our high school careers, this article will serve as a master review of our time on the Talon, anything that had to do with food in specific.

Patrick and I busted onto the scene in the fall of 2018 with our very first food challenge, the Wendy’s four 4 for 4 challenge. We both agree looking back on it that this challenge was the most ludicrous one in terms of content, and that we were sufficiently doomed from the start. Trying to consume two 4 for 4 meals is a task, let alone double that amount, and not even on an empty stomach-we had both made the mistake of consuming breakfast beforehand! To add onto the misery, Patrick was quite sick at the time, and I can recall him only getting sicker as a result of this challenge. Nevertheless, we finished to the best of our abilities, and our very first food challenge was published. Following this, we embarked on endeavors such as the 20 chicken mini’s challenge, the Steak and Shake three holiday shake challenge (which was certainly the toughest of the bunch for myself, I will spare you all the gruesome details of what occurred but one can only imagine what consuming that much dairy and specifically eggnog can do to a poor boy’s stomach), and the Taco Bell 12 pack challenge, all of which we both completed and wrote compelling stories detailing the events. Following this, we hit another highlight, the two-on-two McDonald’s nugget battle which pitted Patrick and I against seniors Wyatt Harris and Egan Beauvais. This epic competition changed us, both as men and as consumers of food, and after a triumphant mac-daddy final food challenge, Patrick and I retired our stomachs from the art of food challenges all together.

Heading into our senior year, we knew that just because the food challenges were ending, the food content was not. Immediately, Patrick and I adapted to the art of food reviews, beginning with the acclaimed Taco review. This still stands today as arguably our best review, being directly followed by our timely and renowned chicken sandwich review. These two reviews put us on the map, and our unique style caught flames. Soon afterward, we decided it would be fitting to focus in more on specific locations rather than food items, and we took our legendary trip to Olive Garden. The experience at Olive Garden was supremely interesting and produced a wonderful piece of journalism which we still hold in high regard to this day. After this, we visited TGI Friday’s, and experienced the challenges of reviewing food on the inter-dimensional scale. This Friday’s review was certainly our riskiest of the year, and after completing it we decided to switch our focuses back on specific food items-but with a twist. Our final food review was one of pizza, but it was a review specifically aimed to scope out the competition of the soon-to-be Dominos off East Lake Road, and It went swimmingly. Unfortunately, the Dominos has yet to open, but we are sure that when it inevitably does it will be a smashing hit. Our final review we had planned was going to be a joint review of all the items and restaurants we had visited up until that point in the year, and although we were never able to physically go back and taste all those wonderful creations once more, I hope that this article can serve as the spiritual 6th food review in a sense-giving the two year-long saga of food related articles we have provided one last goodbye. It’s been an honor, and I can only hope that the staff writers of next year will keep this tradition alive after we are gone.