Talon writer critique

Who could this “Johnny” be?

Who could this “Johnny” be?

Egan Beauvais, Staff Writer

In a modern society where media and news source have become politically biased, the content on news has also seen a stark decline in valuable information. Not only have television and internet sources become untrustworthy, newspapers have actually seen the worst drop in worthwhile content, mostly due to the loss of skilled writers. Many newspaper companies have shut down, and the ones remaining are just barely hanging on. While my current school newspaper staff is still going strong, I cannot evade the fact that a few staff writers have shown signs that they may be a part of that group of declining writers, ruining the value of newspapers. Well in all honesty, as an unbiased and impartial writer, there is one staff writer specifically that needs to be exposed for their degradation of news stories. In order to not offend this writer, I will simply refer to them as “Johnny.”

While this person was believed to be a well-respected writer, known for wit and satirical takes on a range of topics, upon closer inspection you will find undeniable bias and lack of originality in many stories. Stories about hats, hair styles, and windbreakers are fun, but honestly how many can one handle? These are topics that have been written endlessly about, and newspapers need new topics to keep readers from switching over to a more technologically advanced news source.

Not only does Johnny lack inspiration, but this writer has also shown a lack of respect for certain groups of people. Through claims that Victoria Secret fashion shows are a “Men’s rights issue,” and that people are “too sensitive,” it is abundantly clear that Johnny’s goal in writing stories is to spread his own irrational beliefs and hate, rather than to inform the readers about what is going on in the world. A writer should put their own opinions into a story, but Johnny has felt the need to put people down through his opinions which reflects badly on myself and my entire staff.

Lastly, and most importantly, Johnny has begun to write outlandish stories that propose an entirely unhelpful solution to a serious problem. I do not know if this writer has recently been through a trauma, but his last story about his unrealistic worm farm suggests that he has begun to have delusional thoughts. Not only is this entire story a fib, but the agricultural crisis that the world is now coming across is no joking matter. This is possibly one of the most compelling issues that the human race will ever face, and we do not need Johnny to be distracting us from other realistic solutions.

It troubles me to be the one to highlight the flaws in Johnny as a writer, but it is necessary if it means an end to his nonsensical stories. However, I am not the first to attempt to end his writing. According to one of Johnny’s stories, he claimed that another one of his stories about Apple Airpods was kept out of the newspaper due to Mrs. Barbieri feeling external pressure from Apple and the Government. He also claimed that this government censorship was because Airpods have microphones in them, which allow for the government to listen to everything we say, and the government could not let the public find out. I did not think Johnny would stoop to this low, because both of these claims are rather hypocritical of some of his previous statements and actions. He has always insisted that he has respect for Mrs. Barbieri, but he clearly questioned her integrity by saying she is capable of being pressured into censoring one of his stories. Also, his accusations against the government go against his past support of the American government, which is especially shown by his leadership of a political discussion club. Johnny is out of control and this “censorship” was possibly just a blessing in disguise.

It is time for this writer, whose identity could never possibly be inferred based upon this piece, to end his career before his bias is associated with all Talon writers. Goodbye Johnny.