Who is Bennett? Do you know Bennett? Who is Bennett?


This is Bennett. Photo from www.tvguide.com

Patrick Roghaar, Copy Editor

                I have a friend named Bennett. He shares third period journalism class with me, and he is quite possibly the smartest man alive. But who is he? I have grown up with Bennett. From when I moved here in third grade to this very point in senior year, Bennett has been there. But who is he? Bennett is on the varsity swim team, has a nice family, wears glasses, and loves the Tampa Bay Lightning. Not much is known about Bennett. I don’t even know if Bennett is his real name.

Bennett took the same journalism class with me last year and I didn’t talk with him too much as we sat on opposing sides of the classroom. But now with fewer kids in the class and a free-for-all seating chart, I can move freely towards Bennett and talk with my friend. Moreover, Bennett has refused time and time again me and my friends’ invitations to treat him to some Taco Bell Cheesy Gordita Crunches. The decline of a Gordita can reveal a lot about a man. But not much, because I know little to nothing about Bennett. Bennett is rather quiet and keeps to himself, but I am convinced it’s a cover up. I am very close to proving that I am on Undercover Boss, but with a longtime student and friend I have known for 10 years and been to his house and met his family. Undercover Friendship. If Bennett blesses you with his presence, scan the area for cameras. That blessing is a hoax.

Anyways, I hope I provided the right facts for you to write your Bennett biography. If you find Bennett or have a class with him, the best advice I can give you is to approach with caution. He’s practically a God. And that is a fact.